top 10 cereal

Few foods are as breathtakingly as awesome as cereal. As a child it was my breakfast each morning before school, and as an adult it is usually the last thing I eat before I go to bed. It is a meal so easy to prepare that it perfectly meets the needs of lazy, impatient Americans who would rather have bad food fast then good food that they have to wait for.
But what are the very best cereals in all of existence. Man has asked this for millennia and only now do we have the answer.
Using advance scientific process beyond the comprehension of normal human minds, me and my crack team of researchers have discovered, objectively, the ten greatest cereals of all time.
Number 10, Frosted Flakes: A cereal sold by a tiger who just tells us, They’re great… Ya it’s a shitty tag line, but are you going to argue with a fucking tiger? Roy Horn of Siegfried & Roy dissed tony and look what happened to him (really go look it up if you don’t know who this is lol) If a tiger offers you some breakfast cereal, you eat the damn breakfast cereal, I don’t care if you are lactose intolerant, you EAT the cereal.
Number 9: Pops, they get soggy to damn fast, which means you have to learn to eat them quickly. This teaches kids to go with the gusto and seize life, live your life before it gets soggy. Pops invites us to examine the ephemeral nature of truth and hope. Rarely does a breakfast cereal have the courage to challenge its eaters in such a profound manner.

Number 8: Golden Grams, Gram Crackers tend to suck as so you would think that any cereal based on them would suck equal amounts of ass, but you’d be wrong, this is almost like making a cereal called broccoli flakes taste good. Golden Grams deserves it spot simply for making gram crackers bearable.
Number 7 Honey Nut Cheerios, a bee is trying to sell you his sticky bee vomit in the form of little rings…. Do you deny the awesomess of this?
Number 6: Lucky Charms, This cereal is so good that kids chase an annoying Irish midget and harass him for it. It’s one of the few cereals that gives up all pretenses of healthiness and just puts fucking marshmallows in the cereal… marshmallows? They don’t look, feel or taste like marshmallows, they look, feel and taste like compress melted sugar that has been dried in the sun for a several months
Number 5: Cinnamon toast crunch, Cinnamon toast Crunch used to be made by three chefs (the box used to have 3) Then there was only one chef, I think he ate the other two…the cereal is bad ass though, the only real problem with it is it ruins the milk.
Number 4 Cocoa Krispies: Snap, Crackle, pop, suuuure. But instead of that bland and tasteless rice Krispies bullshit you get a mouth full of chocolate, a cereal that talks and tastes good, that my friends is win of an epic variety.
Number 3 Fruity Pebbles, This is like the LSD of cereals, it confuses you by confronting you with too many colors and flavors all at once. It’s a sublime rape of your soul. And just to mind fuck you even harder, it’s peddled by the Flintstones. They have nothing to do with it really, there are no dinosaur shapes or anything, it’s just called pebbles which is the name of Fred’s daughter, soooo you are eating Fred’s daughter, and she’s fruity…. This cereal is a fucking trip
Number 2: Peanut butter Crunch, it’s the color of fetus, ‘nough said….
And the number one cereal of all time is: Count Chocula
Most cereals choose a cute mascot, like a toucan or a leprechaun or a little froggy. Count Chocula is a fucking vampire, he drinks human blood. Plus this cereal has marshmallows like lucky charms and its fucking chocolate, it’s like eating pure sugar, it’s barely even a cereal, and once again the mascot is a fucking vampire, does it give anymore bad ass than that? No, no it does not.
The End
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QMlJw6nMIc

My Goal

Until May 8th I will probably not post at all, not that I have not been posting much.
I have finals the week of May 8th and then some the last week in may, so until then I am basically dead to the internet.

But Starting May 9th, I will be setting a goal to have a fully painted 1500 point army of sisters of battle, totally one hundred percent painted, maybe not based though.....

I will have the following painted by the end of June:

2 Cannoness, that may/not be jump.
2 squads of 10 sisters of battle each with choice of 2 flamers, or two meltas (probably be converted meltas)
3 squads of 6 dominions w/ 4 flamers and 2 meltas each (so i can pick and choose)
2 Squads of 6 celestians, each with 1 flamer, 1 heavy flamer, and 1 multimelta.

and a grand total of 2 rhinos, and 5 immolators, just for now, and this will probably put me right below 1500 points, but lets put this as my goal.

Tactica: Jump Pack Canoness (Anti Tank)

Welcome to another installment of Tactica. This time I will be talking about Jump Pack Canoness. This is sometimes referred to as the Flying Nun of Doom, for obvious reasons. She can be one of two things: Incredibly awesome, or incredibly bad. You will probably end up using atleast 1 faith point on this lady per turn after the first turn (if not the first turn).

First things first, You do not need to take a Flying Nun with a retinue of Seraphim. I personally think this is somewhat wasteful of possible contesting units/ units to destroy the enemy. I think the best possible way to take a flying nun is to take 2, and a squad (or more) of seraphim. What you want to do is first turn, send one flying nun towards one target, send another nun towards another target, and send your seraphim towards a third target (generally the toughest target, I will explain why later) Make sure that your nuns are in cover, and if possible your seraphim too.

Before I go much further on lets talk about set up:
I generally run them as Anti Tank, so lets talk about that.
With one nun you want:
Jump pack, Cloak of St. Aspira, Mantle of ophilia, Eviscerator, inferno pistol. Most people take a Book of St. Lucius, but I do not as most likely my canoness will not be near any of my other troops. I take the jump pack for obvious reasons. Cloak of St. Aspira gives your canoness 2+ armor save. I would take Evicerator so when you get into combat, you are pretty much going to destroy the tank, but also I take the inferno pistol to try to take out the tank before I have to assault it. The combo of the evic and inferno pistol almost assures me that I will destory the tank. The mantle of Ophelia is one of those things where it is only one per army. Put this on one of your canoness, this will save you from insta kills :).
For the second cannoness have her have the same things, minus the Mantle of Ophelia.
The seraphim, because they are essential for this should have 2 inferno pistols w/ the VSS w/ inferno pistol and evicerator. This will for sure blow up tanks :)
The reason for giving so much anti tank shtuff is well, its an anti tank Jump Pack Canoness post...

Now moving on to actual tactics.

Set Up Tactics:
Figure out which target you want each unit to take out. I generally have my canonesses go after rhinos/walkers/chimera, while my seraphem go after predators/dreads.
I set my units up as close as possible to their targets, while still in cover of either a rhino, or another unit, but if possible go behind terrain that blocks line of sight.

1st Turn Tactics:
Send em on out, they probably wont attack at all this turn, but the seraphim you may be able to take some shots but probably not. Your best bet is to send your phim/canoness up as far as you can that will ensure that you are able to hit next turn. If you can then throw them in cover. If they are not in cover you may want to throw a faith point on the sister with out the mantle of ophilia, and throw on some Spirit of the Martyr.

2nd Turn Tactics:
Turn two is when you should be able to jump within three inches (you hope atleast) of your target. Jump shoot inferno pistols, assault if you must. Sometimes you will destroy the target with the inferno pistol, not always though. With your phim, use your hit and run, so that you can come back next turn, and repeat. So that goes, Jump, shoot, assault, hit and run (if possible), rinse and repeat.

3rd Turn Tactics:
Destroy what ever target you are on if possible, and go after other targets, and make sure if you are doing objectives, you make your moves in the general direction.

4th Turn Tactics:
Get within 15 inches of objective if playing for that, if not, kill shtuff.

5th Turn Tactics:
Go for contesting objectives. Get their, plant your butt on the objective, and you have atleast contested it.

More to come...

In the Grand Scheme of Things...

By mid of summer I hope to have the following (due to conversions and scratch builds and shtuff...)

2 Jump Cannoness models(with many magnetizing shtuff to customize em.)
2 Regular Cannoness (with many magnetizing shtuff to customize em.)

30 Celestians
3 Rhinos
3 Immolators
18 acro-flagellents
9 Death Cult Assassins
57 Sisters Repentia and 3 Mistress

120 Sisters of Battle
6 Rhinos (maybe 12)

30 ish Dominions (yes this will possibly Include some of my regular sisters)
3 rhinos
3 Immolators
42 seraphem (for max custom stuff)
9 of something special that you will see soon, that will use the custom vehicle rules :)

3 Immolators
3 Exorcists
9 Penitent Engines

This is what I am currently working at. I plan to have between 120-150 sisters of battle by Summer time. Since I am actually carving most of the sisters of battle pieces out of epoxy putty, I will be molding a lot of it. This will help out on time. I will have WIPs up and how to stuff up for each individual type of unit. So thats a few How to stuff coming up soon.

Also soon to come is some more tactica.

Best Battle Sister squad layout

If you want a tricked out awesome squad choice you do this;

Veteren sister supperior, tricked out with what ever will help you with what army you are facing.

One heavy flamer

One melta

Seven battle sisters

Rhino with smoke

This is just an awesome buinld
This is awesome

Cannoness Conversion

I found this picture on ebay. This is an awesome conversion using the living saint model and eldar swooping hawk wings.

This has made me think that I want to have atleast two converted living saints in my army to act as Jump Cannoness. Though I may not use them always, I want that ability.

I have one criticism of this piece. Swooping hawk wings, naw, go for the Pegasus wings :)

Plastic Arbites

I love Arbites, they are to me, the bread and butter of the Inquisition. I really want to get a hold of the metal arbiters from the Necromunda collection, but am rather low on the funds to buy these awesome models. So another great conversion from http://roguehallow.com/, the plastic arbite, I will be cranking these out as well fairly soon.

As it says on the website, the components are as followed:

o One (x1) set plastic Space Marine Scout legs
o One (x1) Scout shotgun
o One (x1) set plastic Space Marine arms including shoulder pad
o One (x1) Cadian torso
o One (x1) Cadian head, helmeted with chinstrap in place
o Holstered pistol, pouches, and grenades
o Green stuff

I think when I end up doing this I will follow this exact set of components. Check out the web site, it has awesome conversions including regular terminator to grey knight terminator, along with many other awesome sculpts.
(all conversions © Games Workshop)